Blurry
by devirnis
Summary: During a fight with an Arrancar, Renji takes a hit for Rukia. With his life hanging by a thread, they are finally forced to acknowlegde the feelings they've kept buried for fifty years. Complete.
1. Find A Way

**Blurry**

/

_You could be my someone_

_You could be my scene_

_You know that I'll protect you_

_From all of the obscene_

/

She shouldn't have even been there. That was the truth. She wasn't even the closest, but when she sensed that an Arrancar had made an appearance, she just had to go. She had to help. But her desire to help only ended up hindering him.

/

Whenever she was around, he couldn't fully concentrate. There would always be some part of his mind—sometimes small, and sometimes he was so consumed that he could barely focus—that kept wandering back to her. It was even worse when they were battling together. If she wasn't safe in his peripherals, he could never truly pay attention. At any and every opportunity, he would swing his head around, and his heart would pound just a little bit faster until he could see her.

This time, it was even worse.

This was a friggin' Arrancar. Granted, it wasn't an Espada, but it was still challenge enough for lieutenants, and something that an unseated officer definitely shouldn't be tangling with. And boy, was this one a doozy. Not only was it a big sucker that kept waving its huge, meaty arms around, but it also kept lashing out at them with barbed whips. No one had been hit yet, but if they were, it was sure gonna hurt like hell.

He glanced over his shoulder, looking in the direction she had been the last time she stepped out of his gaze.

"Renji!"

His head shot up at the warning shout. Coming at him was one of the Arrancar's massive fists. He neatly dodged it, and winced as the building beside him lost its top half. That definitely would have stung.

"Thanks for the head's up, Rangiku!" he called back.

The buxom lieutenant smiled, and then proceeded to lash out with her Haineko. Elsewhere, he could hear Captain Hitsugaya grunting with exertion. The Arrancar roared and turned away from Renji to face its attacker. He used the momentary lull in his fighting to check for her again.

She was on the outskirts of the battle, a little higher up in the air than the rest of them, probably taking a breather. Good. She was out of danger for the moment. Just as he turned back to the Arrancar, he heard Rangiku cry out in pain. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the lieutenant get clipped by one of the enemy's swinging fists. She went flying backwards, but skidded to a stop mid-air. From the looks of things, she wasn't injured.

However, the Arrancar's attention was no longer focused on the lieutenant. Its rage-filled gaze was now resting on the other female Shinigami – who wasn't paying attention. She was looking anxiously at Rangiku, making sure she wasn't hurt; she didn't see the barbed whips headed her way.

"Rukia!"

/

She looked up at her name, and saw the attacked coming at her. Immediately, her stomach dropped. There was no way she would be able to dodge this. Her eyes widened as the straps came at her …

And suddenly, there was someone in front of her. Renji. He was facing her, his back to the enemy. What was he—?

They locked eyes just as the barbs hooked into his flesh. She saw the agony creep onto his face, and something wet splattered across her cheek. Ice poured into her veins. It felt as if the wind had been knocked out of her. Everything seemed to go quiet, and she could hear all to well the sound of his skin tearing as the hooks raked through his back.

Before anyone else could react, one of the Arrancar's fists came crashing down on Renji, sending him hurtling into the ground. A small, choked gasp slipped out of her. She didn't know what to do.

"Rukia." It was Captain Hitsugaya. "Get Renji to safety. We can handle this on our own."

She nodded dumbly, and hurried to the ground. She vaguely heard Rangiku on her soul phone, calling for assistance from Squad Four. As soon as her waraji touched the grass, dread bubbled up inside her. She could see Renji's limp form, lying face down, a few feet away, and though she desperately wanted to run to his side, she was terrified of what would greet her. That hit … was it hard enough to …?

No, she could see him breathing now. She rushed over to him and kneeled beside him. As she reached out to shake him, her breath caught in her throat. His back was ripped to shreds and covered in blood. He stirred as he sensed her presence, but she couldn't bring herself to speak. She just couldn't take her eyes off his back.

_Come on, snap out of it. You need to get him out of here._

"Renji?" she ventured cautiously.

He grunted in reply.

"We need to get some place safe. I need to get you up."

"Whatever you need." His voice was weak, but he was trying to hide it. Before she could reach down to help him, he was already struggling to his feet. She was impressed: he made it halfway to his feet before he gave in to the pain, and collapsed to his knees.

Rukia grabbed his left arm and draped it over her shoulders. "Don't be an idiot. Let me help."

He chuckled. "Aren't I a little tall for you?"

_Trying to lighten the mood with humour. How typical_. She laughed anyway, because it was true. She was standing up, and he was kneeling, but he was just barely shorter than her.

"I can manage."

With her help, he managed to get to his feet. However, he was slumping, and they couldn't go more than a few steps before he stumbled. Rukia tried wrapping her right arm around him, in an attempt to offer more support. As she touched his injured back, he tensed, and made a small, pained noise.

"I'm sorry," she apologized meekly, feeling completely helpless. She wanted to help him, but she just ended up hurting him instead.

"'S alright," he murmured. "Do what you have to do."

And so they staggered forward under the moonlight. It began to rain.


	2. Shattered

**A/N:** A slightly revised version. Realized that I used the same sentence twice.

* * *

Though he wouldn't let Rukia know it, he was in absolute agony. With every step they took, her arm would shift ever so slightly on his back. She probably didn't notice this subtle movement, but with each shift pain exploded all over his back. The rain didn't help any, either. While the drizzle had, at first, soothed the ache, when the rain became heavier, each drop that hit his skin felt like someone driving a needle into him. The only thing he could do to somewhat distract himself was clench and unclench his fists.

He was trying his best, but he could feel his consciousness ebbing away from him. They were walking, and every so often it felt as if he was dozing off. The pain would lessen, and he couldn't feel the ground anymore. Then Rukia would falter under his weight, and he would grasp feebly at his senses, pulling them back. He wasn't going to just slip into the dark and let her blunder through the midnight streets with his somnolent body.

_Clench. Unclench. Clench. Unclench._

Suddenly, he realized she was talking to him. "Just a little further … hold on … won't be long now … we just need to find an empty building … You can do it … only a little further …"

Huh. She was comforting _him_. What a role reversal. He wanted to speak, but he just couldn't find his voice. All that came out was a rough grunt, which caused Rukia to begin another round of encouragement. However, he could still manage a small smile.

_Clench. Unclench …_

His eyes closed. The burning pain in his back diminished, and the ground began to feel like it was sagging under each step. Realizing what was happening, he tried opening his eyes, but he just couldn't find the strength to do so. He could feel the weight coming off his feet and shifting to Rukia's shoulders, but he couldn't stop it.

Then he was swimming in blackness.

/

She felt Renji collapse on her, and her heart began to race. She needed to find somewhere—_anywhere_—to get him to lie down. So far her frantic blunders through the dark streets had yet to yield any place to say.

"Hold on, Renji," she whispered, knowing full well he couldn't hear her. At this point she was just trying to calm herself down. "There's got to be some place around here. Just a little further and we'll find something." Her voice cracked in panic. "Please. Please let us find somewhere. Please, please, please. Anything. Just somewhere."

As she rounded the next corner, her choked pleas were answered. An old, decrepit warehouse seemed to stand out in the moonlight. The tightness in her stomach disappeared, and she heaved a sigh of relief. Using what little stamina she had left, Rukia ran, as best she could under Renji's weight, into the abandoned building.

"Thank you," she gasped, to whatever had guided her here.

She lowered Renji to the floor, as gently as she could. When his raw back touched the cold concrete, his face screwed up and he let out a low groan. Despite her worry, she was glad that he'd made some sort of response to his pain. It meant he wasn't completely gone.

"Renji?" Her voice was barely above a whisper.

When he didn't respond, she gingerly placed a hand on his shoulder, and shook carefully. He moaned quietly, his eyelids flickering.

"Renji." With more force in her voice. "Wake up."

His mouth opened slightly, as if he were about to say something but didn't have the strength to speak.

Rukia sighed, trying to disguise her anxiety with frustration. Maybe she could annoy him into consciousness. She turned her attention to the blood-flecked cloth that held his hair back. Smiling softly, she undid the knot and pulled the fabric away from his head. Then, in spite of her better judgement, she gently took his hair out of its usual, wild ponytail.

"The hell're you doing?"

Her stomach did a flip at the sound of his voice. It was weak and gruff, and he was doing a poor job of hiding the pain he clearly felt, but she could still hear the classic Renji smirk making its way through.

"You're hair's a mess," she murmured, smoothing out the tangled red strands.

"I'm not a girl." He was grinning weakly, and shifted his weight. "I don't—" He stopped abruptly, grimacing. She saw all the muscles in his body tense. He clenched his fists so tightly that his knuckles turned white. After a moment, whatever caused the sudden surge of pain passed.

"Okay …" He took a few deep breaths. "That one hurt."

A nervous feeling crept into her stomach. His voice was even fainter than before. Frankly, she was amazed he was still conscious at this point. She had caught a few glances of his ravaged back during their hasty stumble to shelter, and … _Oh damn. His back. He's lying on his back._

"I need to flip you."

He made a small noise, something that sounded like a slurred "sure". This wasn't good. He was fading again, faster than she could handle.

"Come on, here we go …"

She grabbed the back of his shoulders, getting ready to push him into a sitting position. However, as she lifted him from the floor, she heard a sickening noise. Like what the mortals called Velcro, being pried apart. Before she realized what it was, Renji caught his breath, and began making horrible choking sounds. Suddenly, it clicked. She had placed his bloody, shredded back onto the concrete floor. Straight onto the floor, with nothing under it. While she had been talking—_grooming_ him—the blood had dried, and fused his back to the cold concrete.

Freshly healed wounds were ripped open, and blood began to pool under him.

"Damn. _Damn_!" She fought back tears of frustration and guilt as she lowered him back down. "I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry. I wasn't thinking … this is all my fault … everything is my fault …"

"Shut … up …"

She inhaled sharply at his voice. It was weak, so weak, but he was still with her.

"What?"

"Stop … blaming yourself." It was clearly an effort for him to talk. Her anxiety returned.

"But if I hadn't shown up, none of this would have happened. You would be fine. I should have left the Arrancar alone. I just wanted to help."

She could barely hold the tears back now. The sight of him, lying broken in front of her—_because_ of her—was too much to bear. But she'd seen a similar sight before, on Sōkyoku Hill. When he'd gone up against Aizen to protect her. And even then, he'd barely healed from the battle with her brother. Even before that was his confrontation with Ichigo. He had been so determined to save her then. He had looked just like that, determined, before the Arrancar had struck him. Determined to protect her, no matter what it cost him.

"Why did you do it?" She managed to ask, her voice shaking.

"What?"

"Why do you _keep_ doing it? Saving me?"

He looked at her as if she'd asked him the stupidest question in the world. What's one plus one, what colour is grass, why do you keep saving me?

"Tell me." Where the hell was Squad Four?

"Because … you're worth … saving …" He looked at her then, with such power and force in his eyes that it almost frightened her. When he spoke, his voice was strong and resolute. "Rukia Kuchiki, I would die for you a thousand times over."

And with that, his eyes shut. His breathing slowed. Anxiety turned to outright panic. He was bleeding out, and there was nothing she could do to stop it. _"I would die for you a thousand times over." Die. But he's not dying! He can't!_

She shook him, not caring if she hurt him anymore. He had to come back. He had to wake up. He wasn't going to die, he couldn't. Not now. Not before …

"Renji! Stop kidding around! Come back!"

He didn't respond.

"Please, Renji. You can't leave me alone. You've been with me since we were kids. You've …" Tears flowed freely down her cheeks now. "… always been a part of my life. It can't end this way. It can't!"

A large sob interrupted her speech. She leaned over him, her teardrops splashing down onto his face and hair.

"_We_ can't end this way!"


	3. Airplanes

**A/N:** If anyone's wondering about the obscure chapter titles, those are just the songs I was listening to when I wrote that specific scene.

Also, reviews are greatly appreciated!

**UPDATE (10/19/10):** Just fixed a small mistake that was pissing me off.

* * *

"Rukia Kuchiki, I would die for you a thousand times over."

Renji even surprised himself with the way his voice sounded, firm and almost stubborn. He had no idea where the strength came from for him to make that statement with such intensity. Maybe it was the shakiness of her tone that had spurred him to reassure her … Whatever it was, as soon as the last word was out of his mouth, he felt completely drained. His eyelids slipped shut without warning, and he felt his whole body go limp.

_No. No, no, no … This isn't it. This can't be it, can it?_

Though any normal person probably would have felt panicked, Renji simply felt … regretful. It could have been because he didn't have the energy his body required to panic, or maybe because he wasn't the panicky type. Regardless, all he could feel now—besides pain and extreme fatigue—was sorry, and a little bit depressed.

"Renji! Stop kidding around …"

She sounded miles away, almost like an echo. She also sounded frightened. Could he blame her? If their roles were reversed, he sure as hell wouldn't be able to keep it together. Was that why he was remorseful? Because she was worrying about him, and he couldn't comfort her? A little bit, yes … But there was something else.

"… can't leave me alone …"

_I'm sorry, Rukia. I'm sorry I'm putting you through this._

Ah. Now he had it. His inability to speak had unveiled why he really felt crestfallen. There were so many things he hadn't said, to so many people.

The people at the Urahara Shop—Tessai, Jinta, Ururu, and Urahara himself. Despite all their constant ribbing, he really did like it there. Being called a mooch didn't really bother him anymore. It was more like a term of endearment, but he'd never be able to tell them that.

He should have told his captain how he really felt. While at first Byakuya had been someone to surpass, he was now also somewhat of a role model … Well, maybe he didn't actually want to tell Captain Kuchiki that.

Ichigo, the annoying, hot-headed ginger. They'd never been the best of friends, but they could get along. He'd been jealous, jealous of how close Ichigo and Rukia seemed to be … But Kurosaki wasn't such a bad guy. He'd have to look out for Rukia, now.

"… always been a part of my life …"

Rukia.

That was his biggest regret. There had been so much to tell her. _I'm sorry_, for one. Sorry for letting her go to the Kuchikis. Sorry that she felt he'd abandoned her. Sorry he'd lashed out when he arrested her. Sorry for how he'd acted before his fight with Ichigo, before her execution.

But all those apologizies paled in comparison to what he'd wanted to say to her since he was made lieutenant—hell, since they were kids. Something that he had taken a long time to realize himself. When he finally acknowledged it—why his heart leapt every time he saw her, why he sometimes had trouble saying her name, why he felt an overpowering, consuming need to protect her, make sure she was happy—he'd been terrified.

_And now I'll never get to tell you._

Something wet hit his cheek. It was enough to snap him out of his rambling thoughts, but he still couldn't move. He still felt impossibly faint. Another raindrop hit him. No, it couldn't be raining. He was inside, and last time he checked it didn't rain inside. Then he heard Rukia's choked sob, and understood. Her tears were falling onto his face. One landed right on his lips and slipped through. He could taste her salty sadness, and yearned to ease her burden. Maybe if he just died now, she could stop worrying about him.

"_We_ can't end this way!"

_Wait, what?_

Had he heard right? "We" can't end this way? _We_. All this time he'd thought that he was the only one who felt that way, that there was a "we". But … had he been wrong? Maybe she just meant their friendship … No. No, he'd heard the way she said it. She didn't mean friendship.

His heart broke. Why did he have to find this out now, when there was nothing he could do? There was no more time left. How much had he _wasted_? Images of how their life could have been surged through his head. He could have kissed her. He could have married her. He could have grown old with her. If he'd had the energy to cry, he would have.

At one point in his life, he'd thought he had all the time in the world. And now he had none.

/

Rukia was falling apart. Her best friend, her oldest friend, her protector, was dying in front of her. The blood pool beneath him grew slowly, his life flowing out of him onto the cold, hard concrete. Despite her grief, she couldn't help but think about the injustice of it all. They'd both grown up in the shittiest district of the Rukongai, and they'd both come so far since then. The Soul Society. Shinigami. He was a lieutenant. And this is how his life came to a close? Bleeding to death in an abandoned warehouse?

_Life isn't fair, but this …_

Somehow she had imagined the end differently. It was supposed to be sad, but not heartbreakingly tragic. It should have brought a sense of completion and satisfaction, knowing that they had lived long, happy lives, despite the little error when the Kuchikis adopted her. _This_ was just wrong.

"Renji …"

She could at least say goodbye properly. Holding back the sobs, she brushed her tears from his face. Her fingers gently traced the tattoos on his forehead. She leaned forward, bringing her face inches from his. Fresh tears fell, wetting his cheeks again.

"Renji, I …"

And suddenly, there was yelling outside the warehouse. Medical terms, something about surgery. Her head snapped up, and hope flitted through her body. The members of Squad Four rushed inside, all wearing gritty expressions. Captain Unohana followed them, looking as calm and serene as ever.

Unohana took one look at Renji. "We'll have to do the surgery here."

Rukia felt herself begin to panic again—they couldn't move him? How far gone was he?—but the captain's soft gaze set her heart mildly at ease. This was Captain Retsu Unohana. She could probably bring the dead back to life.

Relief, warm and wonderful relief, swept over Rukia. Everything was going to be alright now. She assumed that she would have to move so Squad Four could do their job correctly, but everyone seemed to position themselves around her. They quickly flipped Renji, and placed a white sheet over his back. Truth be told, she didn't want to leave his side. She had come so close to losing him, she'd probably never let him out of her sight again.

Her eyes noticed movement underneath the sheet. It was small, easily missed, but she could see. His fingers twitched beneath the white covering, searching for something. She smiled as the surgeons began to work, knowing what he was unconsciously seeking.

She slipped her hand under the sheet and grasped his. Their fingers intertwined, and she could swear that, despite his comatose state, he grinned weakly.


	4. Flowers for a Ghost

**Two weeks later**

Renji stretched out on his futon, staring up at the ceiling. He scratched absentmindedly at the bandages that swathed his torso. When he began to count the imperfections in the plaster, he realized that he was completely and utterly bored. He sighed, went to stand up, but then thought better of it. After two weeks of complete isolation in the Infirmary, the last thing he needed to do was tear open the still-healing wounds on his back, and wind up back in boredom central.

Sure, he was bored _now_, but this was like Boring City. The Infirmary was more like Boring Hamlet. There was nothing to in a hamlet—hell, he didn't even know what a hamlet _was_—but in a city, at least there was other stuff to do. And he was away from the other patients, all moaning and groaning because of splinters when his friggin' back had been ripped to shreds. That was part of the reason he'd moved out of the Infirmary and into his office.

Part of the reason he had relocated to his office instead of his living quarters was distance. This was closer to the Infirmary, and Unohana hadn't been too keen on letting him check out early. However, he also needed the privacy. He was sure that Rangiku, Izuru, and maybe even Captain Hitsugaya or Momo, might show up with questions, flowers, and—God forbid—those cheesy, nauseating Get Well Soon cards.

Out of the corner of his eye, Renji could see an ominous stack of paperwork sitting on his desk. Wasn't that nice of his captain. Trying to act like everything was normal, ignoring the fact he had almost died, by sending him paperwork. If it weren't for his earlier revelation, that Kuchiki was someone he could maybe look up to and all that mush, Renji would have been steaming. Instead, he decided to take a few deep breaths, and try to remain calm. Or bored.

There was a soft knock at his door. He groaned quietly under his breath. So someone had found him after all. He really was in no mood to explain why in his right mind he had leapt into probably the most painful situation of his life to date. But lying took less energy than being angry and rude, so he readied himself for interrogation.

"Come in."

The door didn't open right away, which peaked his interest. All the people he could think of would have barged right in, with or without an invitation. When his door finally did open, tiny, pale fingers curved slowly around the side. A warm feeling surged through him as Rukia stepped inside and closed the door behind her.

"Hi." She looked almost … embarrassed?

"Hi yourself," he answered, trying to set her at ease. He pushed himself into a sitting position, and leaned back against the wall.

"How are you feeling?"

He shrugged. "Eh. I've been better." Why was she being so quiet? He patted beside himself on the futon. "C'mon, sit. I'm not gonna make you stand."

She paused for a second, but then walked over to the bed, and sat close beside him. She was still very quiet, didn't look like herself at all.

"So …" he tried. "How come you didn't visit me?"

"What?" She glanced up at him. "I did come and see you. What are you talking about?"

"You came _once_," he pointed out. "What, do I smell or something?"

That earned him a quick smirk. "I came twice, actually. The first time you weren't really conscious. Or coherent. It was quite amusing to watch."

"Okay, so why only one visit after that?"

"Unohana said I shouldn't come again." She held up a finger, silencing his impending outburst. "When you had visitors, you got jumpy. Couldn't sit still. You kept opening your back again. That's why no one was allowed to see you." She stopped, then grinned again. "Is it true they had to sedate you when Ichigo visited?"

Renji was taken aback. How did she know about that? Never mind. "Yeah, they had to. Kurosaki meant well, but you know us … we just get under each other's skin so easily. Apparently I was ready to jump outta bed and fight him."

They both laughed for a while, pondering that mental image. However, their humour lapsed into uncomfortable silence. What was he missing? Why was there all this tension between them?

It was Rukia who broke the silence. "What do you remember, about that night?"

The question caught him off-guard. He debated for a second about making a stupid joke, saying something like _I had cereal for breakfast, cleaned up a bit, and, oh … something might have happened with an Arrancar_. But only for a second. From her expression, her posture, he could tell that she wasn't in the joking mood. She was looking for a specific answer, but he didn't really know the question.

"A lot of things. Can you, um, narrow it down a little?"

"When we were in the warehouse … when you were d—" She shuddered, and corrected herself. "—sort of unconscious. I was kind of hysterical."

The light bulb went on. _"_We_ can't end this way!"_ He didn't quite know how to respond. He thought that he'd understood what she meant by "we", but was this her trying to take that back? Had he misunderstood, or had it changed now that he wasn't facing death? Proceed with caution.

"I heard what you said."

Her body tensed, waiting for him to say more. It was now or never. One of them could die tomorrow, and his own near-death experience made for a quick decision.

"I'm glad we didn't end that night, because there's something I really need to tell you." He took a deep breath. "But first I need to apologize."

Rukia gaped at him. "For _what_?"

"Not for something I've done recently, but for …" He decided to try a different approach. "You remember when Captain Kuchiki and I came to arrest you? You remember how stupid I acted? Well, I'm sorry for that. I was just so … angry with you, for throwing your life away for some stupid human, and because _I_ was the one who had to bring you back to die." He chuckled bitterly. "I don't know why I thought acting like a jerk was a good way to deal with it, but hey, you know me: not the smartest person in the world."

He glanced down at her, and was surprised to see her staring incredulously at him. "You idiot!" She shook her head in disbelief. "I already forgave you for that when you almost got your arms hacked off protecting me from Aizen. I sort of assumed that was your weird, convoluted version of an apology."

She smiled at him in earnest, this time. Suddenly, her cheeks became tinged with the lightest pink. There was an expression in her eyes that he couldn't quite place, but it made his mouth go dry and his heart beat a little bit faster.

"So …" She moved from his side to sit on his lap, so they were face to face. "What else do you need to tell me?"

"I …" He gulped, unable to find the right words. "I mean … you … um …"

To hell with it.

He leaned closer, and she mirrored his movement. As his eyes closed, their foreheads touched. He could feel her breath, hot on his face. And he could feel the hesitation on both parts. He knew their thoughts would be similar. This step they were about to take … was it worth it, to risk the friendship that they had only recently been able to salvage? Once this was done, there would be no turning back. Everything was about to change.

Renji beamed. He would take the change, for better or worse. And he would make it work.

He closed the small gap between them, catching her completely by surprise, and gently kissed her. For a split second, she didn't respond, and he prayed that he hadn't just made the biggest mistake of his life. But before the panic could set in completely, she kissed him back. And then he was swimming in ecstasy. Never again would he have to wonder "what if". He cupped her face in his hands, startled to find it wet with tears.

He pulled away. "Rukia? What's the matter?"

She tried, and failed, to cover up her crying. "Nothing … I mean, this is wonderful … I was so afraid … but what if …" She hiccupped. "What if this is … wrong?"

"Wrong?" He smirked. "Feels pretty right to me."

"That's not what I mean! It's just … I know you're a lieutenant now … but my brother … what if this can't happen? I don't want to … not if it has to end …"

"Rukia, do you really think I'd let you go so easily?"

She looked up at him, fearful, but with a tiny trace of hope.

"Even if it is wrong, I don't care. We'll make it happen. I won't ever say goodbye to you again."

He was going to kiss her, but she beat him to it. While they kissed, he was making all sorts of promises in his head. _I'll always be there for you. Every hour, every minute, every second. When the day just won't give in, I'll still be there. I won't ever, ever lose you again._

As they began to get more passionate, Rukia placed more of her weight on him. A sharp stab of pain made him wince, but he hoped she didn't notice. Of course, she did, and she backed off.

"Maybe we should hold off for now," she suggested.

"Like hell." He reached out for her, but she gently pushed his arm away.

"I don't want to send you back to the Infirmary. I'll stay, but no more kissing." She grinned. "For now, at least."

He sighed. "I can live with that."

She snuggled under the covers and leaned against him. Her head rested on the nape of his neck. He wrapped his arms around her small frame, pulling her close. Yes, he would be happy to just sit here with her. Everything that needed to be said had been. There were no more regrets. He closed his eyes, content.

"Renji?"

"Mmm?"

"Can you promise me something?"

That got his attention. He opened his eyes, looking down at her dark hair. "That depends. What is it?"

"Can you promise not to do … _this_ …" She touched his bandages gingerly. "… Ever again?"

He didn't hesitate for a moment. "No can do. I'll always be the one pushing you out of the way, whether you like it or not."

"Don't I at least get a say?"

"Oh, sure, but it won't matter."

"Really? And why's that?"

"The way I see it, I'm almost twice your size. Therefore, my opinion counts twice as much." He planted a kiss on her hair. "Argue with _that_ logic, midget."

/

'_Cause I am lost without you_

_I cannot live at all_

_My whole world surrounds you_

_I stumble then I crawl_

/

* * *

**A/N:** And that's all she wrote, folks! I want to thank **Nightheart**, **hayleygirl**, **Oceanee**, and **opalfinity** for their reviews :)


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